#4 David Bowie

24 07 2008

A Googling (#2) for “David Bowie discography” helps us begin our quest for the undiscovered truth about why bisexuals love David “The Thin White Duke” Bowie. On the covers of his albums Mr. Bowie flaunts, juts, thrusts, glams, wigs, lounges and loafs in all his androgynous glory from 1965 to present (feel free to skip th mid-90s). Half of the 7,630,000 image results depict him as either Ziggy Stardust or The Man Who Sold the World. He obviously sold it so he’d have enough money to buy frocks, boots and lip gloss.

Bowie wrote the song, “All the Young Dudes” for Mott the Hoople, which was recently re-upped in fame because of it’s appearance in “Juno”. Allegedly the song is about rock n’ roll suicide, but the lyrics reveal more:

All the young dudes (hey you there with the glasses)
Carry the news (I want you)
Boogaloo dudes (I want you at the front)
Carry the news (now you all his friends)
All the young dudes (now you bring him down cause I want him)
Carry the news
Boogaloo dudes (I want him right here bring him come on)
Carry the news (bring him here you go)
All the young dudes (Ive wanted to do this for years)
Carry the news (there you go)
Boogaloo dudes (how do you feel)

Bowie’s a total Bi!! Don’t believe me? Here’s Mr. Bowie from a 1995 article in US Magazine, not long after a media bonanza was lit up by his first wife “outing him”. She reported finding him naked in bed with Mick Jagger one morning:

About 15 or 16 years ago, I got pretty tired of fending off questions about what I used to do with my [penis] in the early seventies. My suggestion for people with prurient interests is to go through the 30 or 40 bios on me and pick out the rumour of their choice.

See? Neither confirms nor denies! Which implies confirmation, as we all know.

The important part is not just that he is bisexual, hell being bisexual as a man is practically cosmopolitan these days. The point I’m making is that bisexuals love David Bowie unequivocally and not necessarily because of his musical prowess. He is married to Iman, the most outstandingly beautiful and fierce supermodel of the last 20 years, appeared in one of the best pop satires of the early 00’s, and was in the “Labyrinth”. More than all of that though is this:

The quest for the truth about why bis love Bowie will take more time; perhaps a four part series is in order? Hell, I’m going to need a manhattan and more pink eyeshadow for that.

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4 responses

27 07 2008
ammie

You should check out “Velvet Goldmine,” a movie that shows that Mick-Jagger-early-morning scene among other things. Good times.

28 07 2008
#6: Sandwiches « stuff bisexuals like

[…] recently, we might just suggest it ourselves. We just ask you put on your favorite David Bowie (#4) album. Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)Sex with Sandwiches and Other Choice Bits […]

31 07 2008
#8: Multitasking « stuff bisexuals like

[…] Lather, rinse, repeat. But honestly, what with our busy David Bowie-movie-watching schedule (#4), who has the time? This is why bisexuals are the best multitaskers you’ll ever meet. Not only can […]

24 08 2008
Reclaiming Bisexual Celebrities…Except Anne Heche « stuff bisexuals like

[…] time), Marlon Brando, Cary Grant, Billie Holiday, Angelina Jolie (obvs), Janis Joplin, David Bowie (#4) Jack Kerouac, Kristanna Loken (from Terminator 3 and the one who burned Shane’s house down […]

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